


The Drive

by Tablim



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: AU, Angst, Drugs, F/F, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2019-01-02
Packaged: 2019-05-26 05:30:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,742
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14993831
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tablim/pseuds/Tablim
Summary: Two girls take a spontaneous road trip.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written anything in a very long time. Things are very different in this universe, I'd rather you guys read and say what you think might happen or has happened than have me just tell you. I hope you enjoy...

Two girls were relaxing in a decently sized apartment. The apartment belonged to Cheryl, she had the luck of living off campus and not having any roommates to deal with, save for her ‘unofficial’ roommate, Toni. Cheryl was sitting on the end of the black couch in the middle of the living room, with Toni sprawled out over it, her head resting in Cheryl’s lap as the redhead absentmindedly played with her girlfriend’s pink hair. 

“I’m so glad this school year is finally over.” Cheryl sighed out loud. Toni looked up at her, stretching her body as she did.

“Yeah.” She looked over Cheryl’s facial expression, “You were really busy.” She added, thinking about how often Cheryl was either at class, at work or doing homework. Toni shifted herself, so she was no longer laying on the couch, “Just one more year and then you’re done for good.” The serpent said. Senior year was approaching fast for Cheryl, she nodded hearing Toni say this, grimacing at the thought of finishing up her capstone. Her expression softened when Toni leaned into her, catching her lips into a kiss. Cheryl deepened the kiss, pushing Toni back down onto the couch. They broke their kiss, both girls giggling. 

“You’re squishing me.” Toni stated with a smirk, looking up at the redhead who had her pinned to the couch. Cheryl raised her eyebrows at her girlfriend.

“You’re so tiny…” Cheryl smirked, looking down at the smaller girl beneath her, “You started this.” She added, now holding Toni’s wrists above her head. Cheryl dove down, kissing Toni on the lips and then quickly moving down to her neck. The other girl hummed in content, letting out a sigh when Cheryl found a sensitive spot on her neck. Getting into the moment, Cheryl released her grip on Toni’s wrists. With new found freedom, Toni’s hands became tangled in Cheryl’s hair and she wrapped her legs around her girlfriend’s waist.

“I love you.” Toni mumbled out. Cheryl smiled hearing this.

“I love you too.” She responded, gently kissing Toni on the lips. Cheryl was about to continue but was stopped when she heard the sound of Toni’s stomach growling. Both girls untangled themselves from each other and sat up. “I’ll order us some food.” Cheryl said, reaching for her phone.

It takes about 30 minutes for their food to get to the apartment. Cheryl shuts the door behind her, her other hand holding a pizza box. She places the box on the coffee table in front of the couch. Toni walks from out of the kitchen, hand holding paper plates.

“You know, you didn’t have to pay.” Toni says, “I could have covered it.”  
“Don’t worry about it.” Cheryl quickly says, “Anyway...I’m pretty sure that delivery girl has a thing for me.” She adds, looking up, thinking about the few exchanges she’s had with the same girl.

“Oh?” Toni starts, she then rolls her eyes, “Yeah, if she does it’s probably just because you give bigger tips...I don’t mean that in a I don’t think you’re hot way.” She added, looking at Cheryl before preparing her plate.

“Oh I know.” Cheryl stated confidently, moving back to her spot on the couch. 

By the time Toni was done eating she noticed Cheryl hadn’t even grabbed a plate. She looked at her girlfriend, trying to read what was going on in her head.

“Not gonna eating?” Toni asked her, which seemed to bring Cheryl out of her thoughts.

“Uh...maybe later.” Cheryl stuttered out, surprised Toni took notice. She looks away from the pink haired girl for a bit, avoiding her eyes.

“What’s really up?” Toni finally asked, “You seem stressed out. Do you wanna talk?” 

Cheryl sighed, turning to face Toni, “Yeah…” She began, her hands nervously playing with the hem of her shirt, before she reached out to hold onto her girlfriend’s hands instead. Toni rubbed her thumb over Cheryl’s hand. The redhead sighed before continuing, “Toni, you’d never call the cops on me right?” 

Toni’s widen upon being asked this, “You know I’m one of the Serpents…” She answered. Cheryl narrowed her eyes, still waiting for a proper answer from her. “I’m not going to.” Toni finally answered. Cheryl kept quiet, like she was fighting to say something. She looked down, her hands squeezed Toni’s for reassurance. “What happened?” Toni asked her, before she tightened her grip on Cheryl’s hands.

“I...I’m going to kill myself.”

For most people, saying something like this would be like dropping a bomb, however Cheryl had never a mentally stable person, and honestly neither was Toni. Cheryl looked back up at Toni, fearful for what she was going to say next.

“I don’t get it,” Toni stated flatly, “not the suicide thing...it’s just that...you’re usually not this dodgy when you are.” She said referencing the other girl’s evasiveness to the topic.  
“This time’s different.” Cheryl said, sighing, “Last year...I’m sure you heard about Jason.” 

Toni nodded, their town was relatively small, so news about a young adult’s death, especially an apparent suicide. “I’m sorry.” Was all Toni could manage.

“It was his choice…” Cheryl responded, rather blankly, “after everything that happened with Polly, he just spiraled.” She breathed heavily, as if to keep herself from getting emotional about the subject. She closed her eyes, sighed and reopened them, “I’m going to the Grand Canyon...that’s where I’ll do it.” Cheryl announced determined.

“That’s so far from here.” Toni told her, shocked at thought of Cheryl heading to essentially the other side of the country.

“I wanted company...but only if you want to join.” Cheryl invited her. Toni was deep in her thoughts upon hearing this.

“Cheryl, what about your family?” Toni finally asked, worried for her.

“What about my family? Mother wouldn’t even notice now that I don’t live with her. I’ll think of some excuse.” The redhead rationalized, determined to not back down from her plan.

“What about your Nana? I thought you guys were close.” 

“I don’t care anymore, it’ll be my family’s problem once I’m gone.” Cheryl said coldly.

“Well...what if I don’t want to kill myself either.” Toni told her, gauging her reaction.

“You don’t have to...you don’t have to come with me. I’m only offering it.” The redhead said, her tone softening as she didn’t want to come off as forceful to Toni.

“This is all just so sudden.” Toni said, trying to wrap her head around the conversation going on, “Usually we talk this stuff through.”

“I’m sorry...I didn’t want to burden you.” Cheryl said quietly.

“But why now? Wouldn’t it be easier to do it after you graduate? Seems like a better time to disappear.” Toni sighed, “Sorry, I know it’s not that simple…” Being in a similar spot, Toni knew that this was not as black and white as others would see it.

“TT...I just feel broken...there’s something inside me that can’t be fixed.” Cheryl sighed out, letting go of Toni’s hands. “I’m so tired of everything, everyone keeps telling me to wait it out.” She clenched her hand into a fist, “But I have...and nothing’s gotten better.” She looked down, “I don’t care about school anymore...and” She looked back up at Toni, staring into her eyes, “I know that you’re broken too...and I just...don’t want to leave you here.” 

Toni nodded along, listening to what Cheryl had to say, while also gathering her own thoughts.

“I mean, all those times you’ve talked about much better it would be if you were just dead...those weren’t just jokes right?” Cheryl questioned Toni. It was true, Toni had a habit of wishing herself dead a lot, it had never been a joke to her.

“And you made this conversation about me, what was going to happen to me, not you.” Cheryl added, as Toni seemed more concerned for her girlfriend’s safety then the thought of her dying.

“Yeah, you’re right.” Toni finally said, “This is...really fucked up Cheryl.” The redhead could only nod. “But...yeah, let’s do it.” Toni agreed. Cheryl’s face lit up hearing this.

“Really? Are you sure?” She asked, to which Toni nodded. The pink haired girl had slumped on the couch, taking up more space than Cheryl.

“We’ll make a road trip out of it! We can check out all the landmarks on the way…” Cheryl rambled as the night went on.


	2. Chapter 2

Toni awoke to the sound of various objects being moved around, bags being unzipped and then zipped back up. The girl groaned, wishing she could get more sleep. She stayed still, not wanting to get up just yet. The sound of a wardrobe being opened and then shut rather quickly caused Toni to groan out in annoyance, preventing her from drifting off again.

“Toni?” Cheryl called out to her, the sound of her footsteps getting closer to the bed Toni was sleeping in. “Are you awake?” She asked. Toni mumbled out a yes, opening her eyes and turning her body over to face her girlfriend who was already awake and out of bed. Cheryl smiled, and leaned down to kiss her girlfriend. Toni smiled into the kiss, then she broke away to ask, “What time is it?”

“It’s 7:30.” Cheryl told her, moving away to continue her packing, “AM.” She added, enticing a groan from Toni.

“It’s too early.” She said, grabbing her pillow and putting it over her head to block out the sun coming in from the window.

“I couldn’t get to sleep so I decided to pack for both of us, we can get on the road within the next hour.” Cheryl told her, having a set schedule for their trip. Despite not sleeping the redhead seemed quite energized. Toni groaned at this.

“You should get more sleep.” She told Cheryl, voice muffled through the pillow she was under.

“Do you not wanna go anymore?” Cheryl asked, “It’s okay if you changed your mind.” 

“No.” Toni said, coming out from under the pillow, “I do, let me just take a shower first.” She said, stretching before finally getting out of bed and heading to the bathroom.

Within the hour, both girls were outside the apartment complex next to Cheryl’s red Corolla. The redhead had just finished packing the car when Toni asked her “So what’s the plan for this road trip?”

“Just arrive at our destination. It should only take 40 hours.” She answered, acting as though it would be a short drive.

“Sounds like you have this whole thing figured out.” Toni remarked sarcastically, so much for visiting landmarks.

“Oh hush, just think of it as a romantic getaway.” Cheryl said, before opening the front door to step into her car.

They had only been on the road for about an hour when Toni asked Cheryl a question.

“Have you really been planning this since Jason died?” The question made Cheryl grip the steering wheel a bit harder than needed.

“Yes…” Cheryl answered truthfully, “I’m sorry for keeping this from you.” She apologized, the fact that she had kept this information from Toni the entire they had known each other really did eat away at Cheryl.

“Why did you pick the canyon? It’s so far away from Riverdale.”

“Well that’s part of the reason!” Cheryl exclaimed, “To get away from that town...and if I’m being honest, the drop from the Grand Canyon is sure to kill me, a building in Riverdale is a maybe...too risky I don’t want to end up a vegetable.” She said, grimacing at the thought of surviving a fall, only to be stuck paralyzed the rest of her life.

“And it is really pretty.” Toni commented, getting a peculiar look from Cheryl, which turned to one of understanding when Toni added, “The canyon.”

“Oh! Yeah! Honestly if it ended up being just me I probably would have found another way to do it...but this way is more fun.” Cheryl concluded, her attention more so on Toni than the road in front of her. 

“Careful!” Toni told her quickly, making Cheryl’s attention snap back to the road, where she had to make a sharp brake. A car behind them let out a honk, angry for having to stop short. Cheryl groaned as they had gotten stuck in morning traffic. Toni couldn’t help but laugh.

“See, we should have left later to avoid this!” She teased Cheryl, who couldn’t help but nod in agreement. “And don’t get us killed, I thought we were saving that for last.”

Cheryl smirked upon hearing that, “Well chances of us actually dying from an accident are way too slim.”

“And that’s why you decided jumping?” Toni asked her. Cheryl shook her head.

“Yes and no, it is high up there, but a gun to the head is most lethal method.” The redhead explained, “And...yes I’ve thought about it, but no way in hell would I ever pass a background check to get one.” She said, referencing her many trips to the psych ward and even the one time her mother forced her to go to some ghoulish nunnery for being a ‘deviant’.

Cheryl drove the two of them off the main highway, in search for gas. Finally spotting a station, she turned the car’s blinker on and turned the car. She pulled up to the gas pump, then turned the car before stepping out. Toni was quick to follow exiting the car, the girl examined the area surrounding them. 

“Hey,” Toni began, getting Cheryl’s attention while she was setting up to pay, “I’ll be right back.”

“Oh...okay.” Cheryl said, watching as Toni walked off, heading in the direction of the nearby liquor store. The redhead turned her attention back to the pump machine, watching the numbers increase, showing the amount of gallons going into the car and the amount of money being spent. She sighed loudly at herself, realizing her mistake. It would be best to avoid using her card, the possibility of her mother finding out her location was too risky. 

Toni exited the shady looking liquor store, hand holding a handle wrapped in brown paper. She walked back to the car, before she stopped, as she noticed that there were two figures by the car, and not just one. She narrowed her eyes, walking faster to see who else was with Cheryl, she started to make out that it was a tall man.

“You have such beautiful hair.” She heard him tell Cheryl, his voice did not sound right to her. Cheryl scowled hearing this, she flipped her red hair at the stranger.

“I am well aware.” She responded, voice full of venom. Toni could see that her girlfriend was tense and on edge, it made her feel the same. The man gave a crooked smile at her, reaching out to touch her, which made Cheryl snap at him, “Don’t touch me!” The man quickly backed off, hands in the air like he meant no harm. Toni wanted to sprint towards them and put herself in front of Cheryl to protect her, but she upted to walk even faster, not wanting to draw unwanted attention.

“No need to be such a bitch.” He told her coldly, still standing his ground.

“Just shut up! Leave me the fuck alone!” Cheryl shouted, not even noticing that Toni had returned to her side. She was on full defense mode in case the man tried anything else.

“Cheryl, sto-” Toni began to say, trying to stabilize the situation.

“Go fuck yourself!” The man yelled back, now pointing at Toni, who was suddenly being dragged into the fight.

“Don’t talk to my girlfriend like that!” Cheryl continued, shoving her arm in front of Toni as if to shield her from the man, who was increasingly getting more aggressive. A pair of men exited the convenience store connected to the gas station.

“Alan!” One of them shouted at the man harassing the two girls, “C’mon, we gotta get going!” 

Alan grumbled to himself, as began to walk away from them, “Fucking...just trying to give a compliment...fucking cunts.” Still very aware he was in earshot of the girls.  
“Walk away you creep!” Cheryl screamed at Alan as he slinked off, “You’re disgusting!” She went off, “Talking to us like-”

“Cheryl, chill!” Toni cut her off, receiving a glare from her. “I had to...get stuff.” She said, holding up the wrapped liquor, “Are you okay?” She asked, touching her girlfriend’s shoulder.

“No!” Cheryl responded, still pissed off, flinching away from Toni’s touch “That guy was a creep and he’s been following our car!” 

“I’m sure he just took the same exit to get gas.” Toni attempted to reason with the redhead, but it didn’t seem to be getting through to her, “Alright...we can wait until he leaves.” She told Cheryl, who nodded upon hearing this. Toni looked at the eyebags under her girlfriend’s eyes, “But I think you need some rest I’ll dri-” 

“No!” Cheryl yelled loudly, startling Toni, “You just bring me to the hospital!” Tears were begin to form in her eyes as she vocalized her fears. Toni blinked, stunned at what she just heard come out of the redhead’s mouth. Cheryl shrunk, tears beginning to run down her face, “See! I knew it!” She sobbed, before collapsing next to her car.

“Th-that’s not it Cheryl.” Toni began, squatting down to Cheryl’s eye level as the other girl cried, “I’m just surprised is all...I wouldn’t do that to you.” She said, bringing her hand to Cheryl’s shoulder. 

“I’m not stupid.” Cheryl mumbled out as her body shook. Toni rubbed her shoulder in a comforting manner, before moving her hand to gently cup Cheryl’s face.

“I’m sorry.” Toni apologized, “Drive if you want, okay?” She told her, Cheryl still kept her face down, not facing Toni. “I just don’t want you tired, I know you didn’t get any sleep.” She explained, placing the brown bag down on the ground. She pulled away from Cheryl, pulling out a bag of pretzels from the same bag that had her liquor in it. “I bought you something to eat.” 

Cheryl looked up, “I’m not hungry.” She stated flatly, her face was messy with tear streaks and snot running down her face.

“You skipped out on dinner.” Toni reminded her, “Are you sure?” She asked. Cheryl groaned out a response and Toni sighed, placing her hand back on her girlfriend’s shoulder, “We’re supposed to turn this into a good time.” She told her. More tears fell from Cheryl’s face upon hearing this, she looked back down.

“I’m such a burden.” She sniffled, “You must hate me.” She said, trying to keep herself from sobbing words out.

“I don’t hate you.” Toni reassured Cheryl, rubbing her shoulder.

“But...you sided with that guy. He’s right I am a bitch.” She mumbled quietly, the last thing she said more to herself than to Toni. The pink haired girl moved her hand down to Cheryl’s own, gently clasping it.

“That wasn’t me siding with him babe.” Toni told her sternly, “He was way bigger than both of us...I just wanted to get you away from him as fast as possible.” Cheryl gave a sniffle as a response upon hearing this. “ We don’t need to rush this okay…” Toni continued, “Let’s take our time...it’s just the two of us right now.” She said, embracing Cheryl, rubbing her back. Cheryl hummed.

“Thank you…” She mumbled, hugging Toni back. The two stayed like that for a while, just holding each other next to the now fully pumped car, in the now empty gas station.


	3. Chapter 3

The sun was beginning to set by the time the girls had returned to the highway. Cheryl squinted, attempting to ignore the brightness of the sun. It was a beautiful deep orange and it reflected the clouds in the sky. The car was silent, not a word had been spoken since Cheryl’s breakdown began to subside earlier. It was slightly eerie, how pretty the outside looked, while everything was too quiet on the inside.

“It’s been awhile since I saw the sunset.” Cheryl announced, breaking the silence. Toni nodded along, bending over to look for a pair of sunglasses for Cheryl. The redhead smiled, “I was so busy with school I just didn’t have time to look at one.” She continued, “I use to daydream about watching one with a girl...or stargazing.” Cheryl admitted, glancing over at Toni,. “I never had time to watch one with Heather...work and school got in the way.” She frowned, Toni also frowned hearing the mention of that name. Cheryl clenched her jaw and gripped the steering wheel tighter, “I didn’t think it would be like this.” She said, referencing the setting sun in the distance, “I thought it would be more romantic but this…” Cheryl could feel herself beginning to tear up, “This is just painful.”

“Yeah…” Toni agreed, before passing Cheryl her sunglasses. The redhead thanked her, wiped her eyes and put the glasses on. “Have you ever drawn one?” Toni asked her, keeping the conversation going.

“Oh...well.” Cheryl was lost in thought for a bit, “It’s been awhile...but before college I did...you can’t capture it in just black and white though, I had to use color if I was drawing one.” She admitted, personal art had been put on the backburner for quite some time now. Cheryl sighed to herself, missing when she had time to make art for herself.

“Y’know...stargazing would be fun.” Toni told her, trying to lighten the conversation.

“I’m sorry for yelling at you earlier.” The topic quickly changed, Cheryl finally bringing up what happened earlier.

“It’s not a big deal.” Toni said quickly, brushing it off, she placed her feet on top of the dashboard, relaxing.

“Yes it is!” Cheryl exclaimed, “You didn’t deserve that. I’m sorry.” She apologized. “I’ll try to be better about my paranoia.”

Toni smiled, “I appreciate the apology.”

Not long after the sun had set, under Toni’s suggestion Cheryl decided to hunt for an area they could park the car overnight. Luckily they managed to find a desolate parking lot. Toni was slumped in the passenger's seat, having the seat extended backwards. Cheryl was in the backseat, laying across it, using it as a makeshift bed. The passenger window was open as Toni had a lit cigarette in hand. She took a drag from it, making sure that she exhaled it out the window and not into the car.

“Toni?” 

“Go to sleep Cheryl.” Toni told her.

“I can’t sleep.” Cheryl whined back.

“Take your meds then?” Toni responded then continued smoking.

“I didn’t bring them.” Cheryl answered.

“Not even your sleeping pills?” Toni questioned, puffing out smoke.

“I don’t want to die on medication.” Cheryl responded flatly, expression growing sour.

“You’re a mess Cheryl.” Toni responded, then put out her cigarette. 

“Even my sleeping pills are antipsychotics...” Cheryl revealed to her, “I just want to feel like myself again” She admitted.

“Fair enough.” Toni told her, and closed her eyes.

“You know...if you came back here and cuddled me I’d sleep easier.” Hearing this, Toni opened her eyes and turned to face Cheryl.

“Alright…” Toni agreed, beginning to step out of the passenger seat, “You’re clingy, you know that?”

“Oh shut up.” Cheryl retorted, attempting to make some space for her girlfriend to join her, which was futile. Cheryl pulled Toni down into her, so the smaller girl was on top of her, she wrapped her arms around her.

“You know, you actually have to try and sleep.” Toni teased her, as cuddled into her girlfriend. Cheryl loosened her grip on Toni, as they repositioned their legs to be intertwined.

“Comfy?” Cheryl asked, her hand moving up to play with Toni’s hair.

Toni mumbled, “Mhm...I love you.” She said before pecking her on the lips. Cheryl smiled into the kiss.

“I love you too.” She then sighed in content.

Fifteen minutes went by, Toni couldn’t get to sleep, despite being wrapped in Cheryl’s arms and legs. Her head laid on the its side, eyes open in deep thought. She heard a light tapping noise, which made her freeze. She raised her head, looking at the car’s windows, sighing in relief to see that there wasn’t anyone standing outside tapping on the glass. She then realized the noise was coming from her girlfriend whose foot was leaning off the carseats and steadily tapping on the ground.

“Why did you come with me?” Cheryl asked her, as she began to open her eyes.  
“Cheryl!” Toni exclaimed, pulling out of her grip, “I thought you were gonna try to sleep!”

“I can’t sleep…” Cheryl grumbled, “Not when I’m thinking about these things.” She replied, her eyes half open with drowsiness.

“Well...close your eyes.” Toni sighed, watching as the redhead did as she was told. Toni began to lay back down on her.

“Why do you want to die?” Cheryl whispered to her. Toni looked up, trying to find the right words.

“There’s lots of reasons.” She replied simply.

“...Name one.”

“There’s no reason not to…” Toni whispered back, “I know it’s not the same for you.” She sighed, looking away from Cheryl, who still had her eyes closed. “Our reasons are different, but that doesn’t mean one is better than the other…” She concentrated, eyes staring at one particular spot in the dark car, “You can have a lot of reason to live and still want to die.” She looked back up at her girlfriend, noticing her foot-tapping had ceased, “Still awake?” She asked. No response. Toni sighed, squirming up, giving Cheryl a kiss on her cheek before untangling herself from the other girl. She moved back into the passenger's seat, grabbing her phone. She groaned to herself, “Fuck…” She reached and grabbed a pack of cigarettes that was sitting on the dashboard in front of her. She glanced back at Cheryl’s sleeping body, before she started to climb out the car’s open window. She quickly called a number on her phone once she had exited the vehicle.

“Hey.” She said into the phone, “Listen I just need to know if you know anyone around here.” She told the other person on the line, “Cool...thanks.” And with that she hung up her phone and began to walk away from the car.

Cheryl woke as light began to leak into her car, the sun had risen. She groaned and rolled on to her back, and stretched her arms out, noticing the absence of a certain weight on her body.

“Toni?” She called out. Getting no reply Cheryl began to sit up, feeling disoriented. She looked around the small space, not seeing her girlfriend anywhere. “Where the hell…” She began, but stopped herself, “Talking to myself...like an idiot…” She growled to herself. She went on with brushing her hair, changing her clothes like any normal day, although it was now in a tiny car rather than her room. She eyed her reflection in the rear view mirror and glared at it before looking away quickly. Finally presentable, Cheryl grabbed her cellphone and called Toni.  
“Heeey!” Toni answered almost immediately

“Hey?” Cheryl responded, somewhat annoyed with how laidback Toni sounded, “Where are you?” She asked, worried for Toni’s wellbeing.

“Oh I’m on my way back!” Toni told her cheerfully. It gave Cheryl some relief but didn’t clear up her confusion.

“Um...okay.” She said, ending the phone call. She stuffed her phone into the pockets of her shorts and exited the car. She then sat on the hood of the car, taking her phone back out and scrolled through several social media apps. 

“That took longer than I expected.” A voice said, and Cheryl looked up from her phone to see that Toni had returned with a brown paper bag in her hands.

“What were you-” Cheryl began to ask.

“You said you wanted to go out feeling like yourself.” Toni told her, opening the brown bag to reveal a plastic bag filled with several white pills, “I wanna do that too.”

“Serious? Are you sure?” Cheryl asked, surprised to see the drugs in Toni’s possession.

“Serious, besides being sober wasn’t any fun.” Toni reasoned, though more with herself than with Cheryl.

“I could have driven you there.” Cheryl said, “I wouldn’t have judge-”

“Sorry,” Toni apologized quickly, “I didn’t want to wake you up.”

“It’s alright.” Cheryl told her, “You wanna get some food?” She suggested.

The two managed to find a quaint diner not far too far from their location, apparently Toni had passed it on her walk earlier. The duo had been seated at a booth, across from one another. Cheryl was resting on her hand, while her other was obnoxiously clanking her fork and against her plate, while staring dreamily at her girlfriend. Toni looked up, gaining an amused expression once she realized she was being watched.

“What are you thinking about?” She asked the redhead, a smirk forming.

“You.” Cheryl answered bluntly, her fork movement having ceased. 

Toni began to blush, “What about me?” She inquired, running a hand through her hair. Cheryl eyed Toni’s nearly empty mimosa that was in front of her.

“How are you feeling?” She asked. Toni looked down at her own empty drink, they hadn’t even been sitting eating that long and she had chugged through it rather quickly.

“Pretty alright,” Toni answered, eyes darting back up to look at Cheryl. Cheryl smiled hearing this.

“Good.” Cheryl said, her eyes glanced to the side, returning to her thoughts. She looked back at Toni, “Tell me about yourself Toni.”

Toni raised an eyebrow, “Cheryl you already know me.” She stated simply, her hand resting under her chin.

“Well tell me about your childhood!” The Blossom practically demanded, “you never talked about that.” She added. Toni sighed, and blinked, her hands now laying out on the table in front of them.

“No thanks.” She stated bluntly.

“None of it?” Cheryl asked a look of concern and curiosity was plastered on her face. Toni sighed in defeat, it was hard to deny Cheryl anything.

“Before the serpents...I had this group of friends.” Toni started, turning her head to face the window, “and we’d go out to restaurants like this” She sighed out again, “I don’t remember thir names, just what they looked like...I know that’s shitty of me.” 

“Well...your brain remembers the most important parts of a person.” Cheryl began, trying to make Toni feel slightly better.

“If people remember me, I hope it’s not like that.” Toni said with a melancholy smile. 

“Don’t be so hard on yourself Toni!” Cheryl said, reaching her hands over the table to join Toni’s. “It’s just how people function.” She added, squeezing her hand.

One of the waitresses had walked over, having been serving a table nearby.  
“Do you want another?” She asked, eyeing the empty mimosa in front of Toni. Cheryl had retracted her hands, a playful smile on her face as she watched Toni. 

“Um...no thanks…” Toni told her, “a water would be great though.”

“Sure thing, I’ll be right back!” With that, the waitress had left.

“Tell me more about your childhood.” Cheryl told Toni, once her attention was back on her, “Where did you live? What were your friends like?” She began, asking questions with no time to get answers, “How did you get involved with the serpents? What happened with your par-”

“Cheryl” Toni quickly interrupted her, she made an X with her arms, “This is a boundary, don’t push it.” She told her curtly, glaring slightly at her partner.

“I’m sorry.” She apologized, “All of it?” She asked, pointing at the now invisible X Toni had created.

“All of it,” Toni answered “I don’t want to talk about my childhood.”

“But!” Cheryl began, I want to know you and how you became who you are today!” She told her, she ran a hand through her hair, “It’s basically now or never, you know.” Toni looked down, listening to what Cheryl was saying.

“I like that…” Toni said, “the part where all my memories die with me” Cheryl huffed hearing this, not exactly surprised at the answer. The waitress from before had wandered back, bringing Toni’s water and the bill to the duo. “Thank you.” Toni said, and the waitress gave her a short nod before she was called over to another table.

“What about stuff now?” Cheryl asked, continuing their conversation, “Please? What about your best friend, well besides me.” She said, knowing only bits and pieces about her friend Sweet Pea she had heard so little about. Toni felt slightly aggravated with the assault of questions coming from her girlfriend.

“Why does knowing this even matter Cheryl,” Toni began, rubbing her temple, “We’re both gonna be dead.”

“Because,” She started, practically emphasizing each word, “I. Love. You.” She stared at Toni, “and I love hearing about you, and we’re supposed to be having a good time.” Cheryl eyed the glass of water, “and you stopped opening up after you got sober.” Toni looked guilty, hearing this from her.

“I’m sorry.” She apologized.

“It’s alright... I’ve been hiding things too.” Cheryl said, looking down at her empty plate, “That’s why we’re here right now.” She reached out to hold Toni’s hand again. She looked back up at her, “Promise me that, you’ll let go of some of that baggage?” Toni squeezed Cheryl’s hand hearing this, “Each day on this trip...I’ll ask you something that I don’t know.” 

With her free hand, Toni drank some of her water, deeply pondering what Cheryl had in mind.

“You know why we’re supposed to have a good time?” She asked Toni, referring to what she had said at the gas station.

“It was a stupid thing to say.”

“It’s because we’re miserable and we shouldn’t have to suffer anymore.” Cheryl answered herself, “This trip is supposed to be a relief, please let go of some of your baggage while we’re here.” Cheryl rubbed her thumb over Toni’s.

“You mean well Cheryl.” Toni said, “even if you have a weird way of putting it.”

“Sooo?” Cheryl began, raising an eyebrow.

“I will.” Toni answered, “Just go easy on me.” 

Cheryl laughed hearing this, “What does that mean? Of course I will! You won’t regret this!”


End file.
